I am
This post is approved for the following audience:
- People above 40, particularly if you are thinking about a sabbatical.
- Leaders – the higher in the hierarchy, the more you will need.
- Partners of workaholics or workaholics with self-awareness.
- People who have been asking if life is just about work.
Read at your own discretion.
Another day I saw a comment: “many of us deal with the pressure of being measured by others and their expectations, and this is tough.”.
Definitely got my attention.
I spent over 25 years in pharma/biotech and I was very successful. From a small company to a “big pharma”, from diabetes to rare diseases – I did all.
When I left, I thought it would be an easy ride. My only plans were to recharge my batteries and find the next adventure.
Two days ago, someone asked if I had written about my experience, and I decided to take this challenge.
Let me just disclosure this first: when I quit, I thought I was free from other people measuring me (aka performance appraisal or labels). I learned I was the really tough one - on myself.
Here are the most important experiences I went through in the last 4 years and the lessons that will stick with me:
I could have done 30% or 40% less on many occasions and I would still have a job, get promoted and, yet I would have had more time with my children.
- It is never too late to spend time with your family. Use your time wisely.
People will think you are having the time of your life. Very few will check how you are doing, even less will stay around. If you don’t believe me, read the book “From Strength to Strength”, by Arthur C. Brooks so you can try to avoid some mistakes you will make (and I did).
I didn’t know what I wanted to do next, so I did a bunch of things:
A) I opened two companies (and closed them). I learned that I didn’t want to be a consultant, neither a CEO nor work in healthcare.
B) I learned pottery, sustainability, human centered design. I learned pottery should be included in any college and, particularly, in MBAs. You can learn more doing pottery than you can ever imagine. I also learned that sustainability still has a very difficult language to get more people involved – this needs to be simplified.
C) I participated in 3 hackathons and got awards in two. I learned that a weekend won’t be enough to solve problems. If you want to do that, you need to persist and get the right team.
D) I embraced arts, reconnected with college friends, discovered more about nature and how much I love it. I learned that true friendship could survive over 30 years!
E) I gave my time to people who wouldn’t give me their time. I learned that value needs to come from within.
F) I started taking care of my home and my family in a completely different way. I learned that this is one of the hardest and underpaid jobs anyone can ever have. If you think forecasting and long-range plans are difficult, wait until you plan meals every day, for years.
G) We got a vegetable garden. Yes, your own vegetables will taste better than the ones you buy in any grocery store. Try it!
I found out I am a multipotentialite (“individuals with multiple interests and creative pursuits). This was such a cool discovery that the best way to describe would be something like this: you spent your whole life thinking that the only place you can swim is a kid’s pool in the backyard until you see the ocean.
I lost 4 people that I loved tremendously: my father, my mom, one aunt and one cousin. I learned grieving is a long process, some kind of a ceremony will help bringing closure, particularly when you are far away, and traumatic loss is real. Don’t underestimate.
Now back to the beginning of this story: until now, if someone would ask me “what do you do”, I would say that I am an artist, entrepreneur, advisory and coach.
Anyways, the comment I read was followed by a suggestion to watch a movie “In & of Itself” (here is the link: https://youtu.be/OR4NNuNE3Yg).
If you consider watching the movie, ask yourself who would you like to watch it with?
Let me wrap this up: the world is so much bigger than you think. Don’t let labels send you to the wrong destination (as it happens in airports with your luggage).
Be kind to yourself!